Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Pimp my TV (RA's Entry)

EXT. CITY STREET - NIGHT

A middle-aged black WOMAN cradles a bloody, lifeless young teen in her arms. WILL, a tall black teenager stands next to her. Sirens wail in the distance.

WOMAN

Will! Will! What have you done!

CUT TO:

CU on Will's face.

WILL

Snitch got what he deserved.

CUT TO:

Medium shot. Sirens closing in.

WOMAN

Baby, you gotta get outta here. Go!

Will pauses a moment, then runs. Camera lingers on him running away, then cuts back to woman and child.

A funky bass riff starts playing. Quick cuts of the city streets - random violence on display everywhere. Muggers, prostitutes, pimps, and dealers on every corner. Cops beating a suspect in the middle of the street. The bass is joined by a small combo and continues through the trailer.

TITLES fly on the screen like spray painted graffiti - "Mean Streets"

NARRATOR (V.O.)

Growing up on the mean streets of Philly teaches a brother to look out for number one. This fly young cat ain't no different.

TITLES - "One Fly Cat"

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY

A posh, huge house. A staircase spirals up in the background. Will stands in the middle of the room with a small bag in one hand and a gat in the other.

WILL

This'll do.

CARLTON, a short but muscular teen, enters the room wearing a bow tie. He's got a shotgun trained at Will.

CARLTON

How can I help you, cuz?

WILL

They call me Fresh. I'm taking over this town.

TITLES - "They Call Him Fresh"

INT. BAR - NIGHT

Will and Carlton beat down some thugs with baseball bats.

TITLES - "Tough"

NARRATOR (V.O.)

From the rough...

INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT

Will and a beautiful woman going at it.

TITLES - "Sexy"

NARRATOR (V.O.)

...to the tumble. Fresh takes no prisoners...

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY

Will is surrounded by FOUR HENCHMEN with guns.

NARRATOR (V.O.)

...as he builds his army.

EXT. STREET CORNER - DAY

Carlton kicks a dealer repeatedly while Will watches, impassive.

TITLES - "Cool"

INT. BOUTIQUE - DAY

Pricey. Lux. Will and his bow-tied sidekick shoot two well-dressed MEN in the head. A WOMAN watches in horror.

NARRATOR (V.O.)

He came to town an outsider, but became royalty.

WILL

Tell your boss I'm comin' for him.

The woman stands still, shaking.

WILL

Go!

She runs.

TITLES - "Commanding"

INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Will and Carlton have two scantily-clad women each. A pile of money fills the coffee table in front of them.

A BUTLER enters with a large silver tray. He lowers it in front of the men and we

CUT TO:

CU on two fat lines of coke. Will and Carlton lean into frame and snort it all.

TITLES - "Living Large"

NARRATOR (V.O.)

He had it all.

INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT

DON GIOVANNI sits at a small table in front of a huge plate of pasta. BODYGUARDS flank him. Across from him sits one of his LIEUTENANTs, scrawny and nervous.

DON GIOVANNI

What the -BLEEP- do you mean they ain't payin' the protection money?

INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

Will and Carlton stand amidst bloody corpses. Girls, their henchmen, their butler.

NARRATOR (V.O.)

And then he had war.

INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT

Will and Carlton strap on guns and ammo, ready for war.

INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT

Will lies dying on the floor. Don Giovanni is dead, his men are all dead. Carlton scrambles over the bodies to Will's side.

CARLTON

(Through tears)

You gonna be fine, Fresh!

WILL

I ain't gonna make it. You gotta take my place. Carry on.

TITLES - "Maybe Just a Little Bit Gay"

CARLTON

I can't.

WILL

You gotta.

(Coughs)

You gotta.

NARRATOR (V.O.)

When the cool fall, it's tragedy.

TITLES - "The Prince of Bel-Air"

BLACKOUT:

5 comments:

Michael Brownlee said...

Nice, Richard. It's a completely different story when there isn't a cheesy rap song to introduce it.

R.A. Porter said...

Exactly. Cheesy funk songs are *way* cooler.

Ken Robertson said...

"He's a bad mutha....

Shut yo' mouth!

Just talkin' 'bout Will :)"

Very nice...the Fresh Prince of whup-ass. Almost makes it feel like Dj Jazzy got left behind because he wasn't street enough.

R.A. Porter said...

Jeff was there. Didn't you see him?

"a bloody, lifeless young teen"

Ken Robertson said...

Didn't recognize him without the headphones.