Friday, June 20, 2008

FSW: Short & Sweet Edition

Dave was out of the gate early today rewriting classic movies.


Richard is up and at 'em having some trouble with the law.

I'm still on Pacific time, which is why mine seems late, but really isn't. 

It's also why mine doesn't seem funny, but really is.


(Paul sits in a kayak, bobbing in the water. He is staring off into the distance, a serene smile on his face. A moment later Derek paddles up to him.)

Derek: Hey.

(Paul nods in acknowledgement) 

Derek: The sunset is amazing out here, huh?

(Paul nods again.)

Derek: Sometimes, if you're really lucky, you'll see a minke whale or some dolphins swim by. Just takes your breath away.

(Paul nods again.)

Derek: I don't think I've ever seen you out here before. You on vacation?

Paul: Honeymoon.

Derek: The new Mrs. didn't want to venture out on the water?

Paul: She loves outdoor activities.

(Derek looks around.)

Derek: The currents can get pretty strong out here. Which way was she paddling?

Paul: Oh, she wasn't in a kayak.

Derek: She must be a pretty strong swimmer to make it out this far.

(Paul nods.)

Derek: And back. I don't know too many people who could do that.

Paul: I don't know anyone who could do it.

Derek: Wait. Did she swim out here or not?

Paul: She did.

Derek: And you let her...I mean, I don't see anyone out here. Look, buddy, I don't know what your deal is, but...

(The cover flips back on Paul's kayak and Marissa pokes her head out.)

Marissa: Hey, Chatty-Charlie, why don't you move along? You're sorta breaking his concentration here and there's only so much oxygen in here once this cover is closed.

Derek: Oh. I thought...I mean, it seemed like...

Marissa: Move it Nanook before I cram this oar up your b-hole.

Derek: Sorry.

(Derek paddles off.)

Marissa: It had better be this biggest goddamn diamond...

(Paul puts his hand on Marissa's head and nudges her back down into the kayak.)

Paul: Shhh. My concentration, remember?

(She disappears out of site. Paul returns the cover of the kayak. He smiles serenely.)

Blackout


4 comments:

R.A. Porter said...

LOFL!!!

Michael Brownlee said...

That's right. When all else fails, go for the bj joke.

R.A. Porter said...

What I think is really cute and funny about it is that it's a honeymoon joke. He should cherish that bj; it's one of the last.

;)

Your mileage may vary, but I'm stickin' with that joke. It's a classic.

NotNits said...

Nice work! I've been out of the loop with my comments, but wanted to get that in there.