Friday, January 23, 2009

FSW: Borders Edition (Ken's Entry)

Wow....who knew I'd be the last one posting at 10:00 am Pacific time.

This here sketch war is heatin' up....
(and welcome back Michael!)
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EXT. SOUTHWESTERN DESERT - NIGHT



JUAN, JORGE and ESTEBAN, all three Mexican men in their early 30’s dressed in ragged dirty clothes, crouch-walk through scrub brush under a night sky, talking in hushed tones.


JUAN

We are almost there mi hermanos...almost there.


JORGE

Madre de Dios! At last! We have made it!

ESTEBAN

My wife, my children, please forgive me for leaving you.


JORGE

You have no choice my brother! We leave that they may survive.


JUAN

Si Esteban! We cross the border so you can find good work, so you will make good money. When their bellies are full with the food they buy with the money you send back, they will understand...they will bless your name.


JORGE

Shhh! Do you wish to alert the border patrols?


ESTEBAN

I pray you are right my brothers.


JUAN

Let us go, now, with no regrets. Let us go where the money still has value, where there are still jobs to be found, where our lives are not at the whims of corrupt men.


JORGE

The border is just there. Run fast, run quiet, and do not look back.


JUAN extends his arm, hand open palm down, and looks at the others. JORGE’s face tightens in determination as he clamps his hand down over JUAN’s. ESTEBAN pauses, thinking, in turmoil. But he too tightens his jaw in determination and smack his hand down over the other two.
Just as the three men stand up and start to run, they are hit by bright search lights. They freeze shielding their eyes as BOBBY RAY and JIMBO enter, pointing shotguns at the three.


BOBBY RAY

Well lookee here Jimbo. Looks like we got three little illegals tryin’ to cross the border.


JIMBO

Looks like.


BOBBY RAY

Now just where in the name of Jesus did you three think you was goin?


ESTEBAN

Please...just, let us go. For the sake of our families, please let us cross.


BOBBY RAY

Did I hear that right Jimbo? Is he askin’ us, a couple of duly authorized Minute Men, to let him just slip across this here border and pretend like we didn’t seen nuthin’?


JIMBO

Sounds like.


BOBBY RAY

Well how bout this, ‘Pedro’. How bout you three get your asses right back where they belong pronto before I lose my temper.


JUAN

Mister, please, have mercy, there is nothing left for us in this country...


BOBBY RAY

GODDAMN IT!!! I am gonna to count to three and y’all best be steppin’ away from that border....1.....2....


JUAN, JORGE and ESTEBAN step back. BOBBY RAY and JIMBO walk over beside them.


BOBBY RAY

We can’t have you boys leavin’ the U.S. just yet - Uncle Sam needs all the cheap labor he can get right now. Y’all go on with Jimbo and he’ll give drive you back into town.


JUAN, JORGE and ESTEBAN exit following JIMBO. BOBBY RAY shoulders his shotgun and shouts after them.

BOBBY RAY

And you tell you’re other illegal immigrant buddies that we’re watching - ain’t none of you gettin’ back into Mexico ‘til OUR economy’s fixed.


Titles fade in over the silhouette of Bobby Ray Standing with his shouldered shotgun:
"THE MINUTE MEN - KEEPING AMERICA’S CHEAP LABOR INSIDE AMERICA UNTIL WE’RE READY FOR THEM TO LEAVE"


FADE TO BLACK.



3 comments:

R.A. Porter said...

I love the Minutemen. Of course, their wives call them the 45-Second Men.

Michael Brownlee said...

Nice, Ken.

Ken Robertson said...

The structure of our scenes was very similar Michael - I was giggling at yours when I read it because of that.

I keep trying to invest more in my characters and up the stakes for them, so I think I front-loaded the setup a bit too much in this one. My next challenge is to make my characters more active and less talky...well, hope springs eternal! LOL